Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Randomize
