Three words: puerto rican gang bang
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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