He asked me if I "almost moaned"
no. you can't hotbox the world.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
is it fun? or sober?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
