I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
