Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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