my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
