White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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