We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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