is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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