Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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