You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
