It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
