Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
