I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He shit in the fireplace
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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