:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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