Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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