I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
