i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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