She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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