I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I got her a Nickelback box set.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
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