Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
