My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Randomize
