I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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