its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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