I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
