You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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