Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
