Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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