So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Randomize