Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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