Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
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He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
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Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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