Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
At least make sure they are 18
Why
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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