I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
so much tequila, so little girl.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
