so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize