i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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