bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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