i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
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