Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
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At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
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The entire state will know me by my boobs.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
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