He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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