Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
So here I am, sexting at work.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
