New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
