hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
