i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
