It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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