just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
