That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
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