You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
