I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
