i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
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he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Are we still banned from the library?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
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You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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