actually, I'm a sock model
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
