I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize